Thursday, March 17, 2011

Lessons from Mom

1. Date your husband~ My mom and dad are not the mushy, never "raise your voice at each other" type of couple. They are feisty, real, funny....and they adored us. Yet, they never failed to make time for each other. I can remember watching my mom blot her lipstick on a piece of Kleenex leaving perfect kiss prints. With a spray of perfume, a word to the babysitter, and a smile as bright as the sun she would float through the door with my dad.  Sometimes it was Dance Club, or dinner with friends, or even a house party with adult laughter and dancing. Whatever it was I felt secure in their love as I watched them head out the door...and I knew that tonight was the night that I got to eat frozen Banquet Mac & Cheese for dinner. Yes! Life was good.

2. Faith~ The foundation for her life. Never preachy or judgemental. Just a steadfast belief that God was always with her...every step of the way. As I grew older and learned more about my mom's life and losses I was amazed that she survived with such grace and not a trace of bitterness. The reason? Her spirit is one with God.  Church was (and still is) her second home.  It became mine also.

3. Nurture your friendships with women~ As much as she loves my dad my mom also loves her girlfriends.  Some of my earliest memories are of those ladies laughing, crafting, playing games, drinking coffee, and always talking. She values her friendships, and now at 80 years old, has seen too many of those women pass away. There is the sadness, but overshadowing all of that, is the happiness they shared. Friendship is so worth the risk and inevitable pain.

4. Keep it clean and tidy~ Well....let's be honest. She taught this, I try to live it, but she is a Ninja cleaner. I can only aspire to be like her someday in this respect.  I loved having the cleanest and best-smelling home in the neighborhood. Bottom line is she taught me to take care of what God has blessed me with.

5. Different people show love in different ways~ My mom was not a speaker of  "I love you" as I grew up.  Actually my dad was the distributor of abundant affection and loving words.  My mom, having never experienced that as a young girl, wasn't as comfortable. Yet, I never doubted her love or even noticed that she didn't say the words often.  She showed it, with every fiber of her being, by lavishing her attention on all of us kids. She showed me that love is a verb. You "do" it...not just say it.

6. Give of strings attached~ My mom's legacy is going to be one of giving. She is famous in our small town for always having the time to send a card, make a visit, cook a meal, dry some tears, or organize any kind of event.  If I tried to describe what she gives in her daily life you would think I was exaggerating. Let me just say  She. Is. Amazing. 

7. Cook~ I know most of us think our moms are the best cooks in the world. Mine really is! :)

8. A few curls and a little lipstick never hurt anyone~  This line used to drive my up the wall! My mom always looks pretty and put together.  I, on the other hand, am very comfortable running into the grocery store sans makeup sporting a ponytail.  Even as an adult, when I see my mom she is likely to remark, "Oh honey, you look so pretty. I love it when you put a few curls in your hair." I think I've finally learned at 44 years of age, it isn't about the hair and lipstick. It's about the fact that I'm still her little girl and she wants to "doll me up".  Once a mom, always a mom.

9.Inner strength~
"If ever there is tomorrow when we're not together.. there is something you must always remember. you are braver than you believe, stronger than you seem, and smarter than you think. but the most important thing is, even if we're apart.. i'll always be with you.” quote from Winnie the Pooh

Pooh summed it up best.  My mom tries to tell me this everyday in her own words.  Through her inner strength she has shown me mine.

10. I am loved....just the way I am~  I wasn't the smartest kid in my class, or the most athletic, or Homecoming queen.  I didn't win any scholarships, become famous, or earn a million dollars.  Yet, my mom's eyes light up every time I step in the room. She makes me feel adored....and isn't that about the best thing a mother can make her child feel? Although she knows my faults, she focuses on my strengths. She makes me feel as if I'm more than enough. I am her blessing, and in that truth I feel blessed.

*I know this is lengthy, and sentimental, and probably filled with a million cliches. Yet, I needed to write this for myself....and maybe for my mom.  At the age of 80 (almost 81) she deserves an entire book about how amazing she is.  I condensed it for this post! :)


  1. Your mom sounds like an amazing woman!

  2. Great list! I think #1 and #3 are so valuable!

    stopped by from mama kat's

  3. I love her ideas! I go to the grocery store undolled up too.

  4. She sounds like a great person. #9 is my favorite. Such an amazing gift to share.

    stopping by from mama kat's

  5. Great post! My favorite is #1 and an area we could probably use some work in; you mom has just taught me something too ;o)~.
    **Visiting from MamaKats***

  6. Your mom rocks! It's the perfect list.
    Stopping by from Mama Kat's.

  7. awwww...super sweet list! I personally can relate to #5 and hope that my family knows that just because I don't say those three little words 57 times a day, that doesn't mean I don't love them more than anything!

    First time stopping by from Mama Kat's...enjoyed it, I'll stop by again!

  8. Your mom sounds amazing. I read this and I really miss mine :( Savor your time together, it sound like you do!

  9. I like #6 and #10. What a sweet post! Your mom sounds like such a great lady. :)

    I love #5 too: love is a verb.., you DO it!

  10. This was a great list. I love it! LOVE LOVE LOVE it! I just can't even tell you how happy reading it, made me...

  11. ahhh that was beautiful! she sounds wonderful as do you. i love the ninja cleaner image i have in my head now! dusting never looked such fun! wow if only one day my kids say the same about me...there's a goal, thankyou for a little pocket of inspiration to carry away with me today, i loved that. also thanks so much for stopping by my blog and your wonderful comment. its lovely to say hello jane xx

  12. I absolutely love this list. I once did a list of the lessons I learned from family and friends. Maybe I'll do one about my mom (on mother's day?). These are really great nuggets of wisdom.

  13. Love it! will send it to my girlfriends! ;)

  14. will sent to my friends!

    I am following you (suelee1998) from the blog hop, you have a great site. Would you please follow me back?
    thank you :)

  15. awesome tips..
    signed in to follow your blog.
    welcome checking us out.

  16. I love this post about your mom and sure hope you let her read it. I felt the same way about my dad and actually did write a book about him in his memory shortly after he died. I think dating your husband is good advice--I really need to do that more! I was very close to my mom too.

    Stopping by from writer's workshop. Here's links to mine if you get a chance to visit: and

  17. Hi there,

    Visiting from TRDC. Such a wonderful post! Lessons we can all learn from and what an amazing momma you have.


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