I woke up this morning eager to get outside and begin planting the flowers that have been waiting so patiently, in their pots and flats, for their new home. We are preparing for a big party celebrating our oldest son's graduation. We are expecting A LOT of people. We are not ready.
When I awoke, the eagerness faded as I saw the gray skies outside. We have experienced days upon days of rain here. Trying to be optimistic, I told myself that the earth will be softer....easier to work with after this week long monsoon. But as I stopped outside and my feet sunk an inch into the grass and water puddled around my footprint....my optimism waned a bit.
I wanted to be outside before the day got too hot. However, 52 degrees is a bit nippy for me when it's combined with the wet ground and damp air. I wimped out and came back inside. The plants will have to wait a bit more for "moving day".
There is much to be done inside. Rooms to be organized and cleaned...little (and some big) repairs that we have learned to live without doing...menu to plan...calls to be made...pictures to organize...the list goes on. Rest assured, there is plenty to keep me occupied inside. But like a spoiled child I wanted to stomp my feet and whine, "Noooooo....I want to plant my pretty flowers todaaaaaaaaay!" I craved that time of communion with God as I worked outside.
It looks like God has other plans...and, after my momentary tantrum, I've graciously decided to just flow with them. Of course, what else can I do? Yet, I have decided to face this Saturday with a smile, to let peace precede where stress wants to lead, and to bask in the sense of accomplishment that occurs when completing any task...big or small.
It seems as if my communion with God will be done over dirty dishes and messy closets. Repairing damage rather than adding beauty . On further reflection, I think maybe that's what was meant for me today. Repair, clean, and organize the internal as I work on the external.
The flowers will still be there...waiting to bring their beauty...tomorrow.
I look forward to my gardening time as communion with God too, so I totally sense your frustration. What a beautiful blog piece of truth and honesty. I hope your day turns around and good luck with the party!
ReplyDeleteKristi, first I want to say congratulations. Then I want to say take a deep breath and do what you have to at your own pace. It will all get done and the things that don't will await another day :)
ReplyDelete...let peace precede where stress wants to lead! Reading this a couple of hours ago helped me to approach my cleaning and organizing in a much calmer, more contemplateive state. I loved your thoughts, and am sending wishes for all to go well, and the clouds to clear soon!
ReplyDeleteThat's how today is for us -- we desperately wanted to take the kids outside ... it's been storming for hours! Outside will be there tomorrow, though, right?
ReplyDeleteWouldn't it be so nice if we could get away with having tantrums like kids do?? I'd love that!!!
ReplyDeleteI hope all your plans come together nicely...it sounds like it'll turn out wonderfully!