Sons and girlfriends.
All the jokes about a mother letting her boy go...
or thinking any girl is good enough for her baby.
I understand because I have two sons who both have girlfriends.
However I find myself looking at these girls...
learning about what qualities my boys deem important.
And if I'm completely honest....
looking to see if there are glimpses of myself in either of them.
I've learned that if she makes my son happy...
then I am happy.
If she can make him strive to be the best version of himself
then I am pleased.
And if she can look me in the eye, smile, and be herself
then I am at peace.
It's funny because instead of wondering if these girls
are good enough for my boys
I wonder if my boys are treating them the way we have raised them
to treat women.
Do they see the inner beauty along with the outer beauty?
Do they remember she is not "one of the guys"
and adjust their conversation?
Do they encourage her to be independent...strong...capable?
Do they remember that it's not all about them...
it's about her too.
Do they show with their words, their eyes, their actions
that she is someone to be respected?
I know this sounds like a tough list of questions
for a 19 and 17 year old to answer.
Yet, it is essential to me that they do.
Because when I look at the girls
I see myself at that age.
So eager to please...so quick to mold myself
into what a thought was a lovable girl.
I remember my insecurities
and how I often hid my own light
so it wouldn't compete with my boyfriend's.
I want more for these girls.
So, yes, I adore my boys.
And, yes, I will protect them to the end.
But I will also watch over these lovely girls...
and help guide my boys into becoming more
of the men they are becoming.
Men of integrity,